New from The
Betty Hubbard Clinic
Exclusive offer from The Betty Hubbard Clinic Bio-Science
normal man has the opportunity to be kept safe from the
on getting all lagered-up in an area known to be frequented by
homosexuals and recently-released long-term prisoners? Then you’re
going to need a MARP to avoid the embarrassment of waking
up face down with a sore arse and a note in your back pocket
saying thanks for a wonderful evening. The anus is a delicate
organ, and one which we rely on to do it's day-to-day business
without disruption, that is why we developed the MARP.
The patented MARP is a technologically advanced plug type device
which is sewn permanently in place into your anal cavity, by our
own trained surgeons at the Betty Hubbard Clinic. If you prefer
the device can also be fitted in the comfort and privacy of your own home. The MARP
uses a unique one-way Gas-Vent™ non-drip valve so your own body gases and solids are
easily passed out of your system, but nothing can enter into it,
so you are kept 100% safe all of the time. Plus, that's not
all! Thanks to clever internal
electronics the MARP protects you as you sleep emitting an
ear piercing 98db alarm if anything comes even close to your
buttocks. The MARP is also fitted with silicon o-ring
seals to guard against leakage.
Don't delay, in this day and age you can't afford not to fitted with a MARP! See our
website for our other unique
products and services.
only this device had been available when
Jimmy Savile was alive
things could have turned out a lot different for meAnon - Male rape victim.
Take a look at
these great features.
Sewn permanently in place.
Built in alarm system.
10 year battery life.
Guaranteed for 5 years.
Developed by top scientists.
Fully fitted in only 35
Laser guided alignment for
the perfect fit.
Nurse Lana with the MARP insertion tool A MARP shown actual size
web offer price of only
£199 fitting and alignment charge
Order your MARP today and
receive this special deterrent t-shirt - your first line of defence.
Any pervert will think twice before trying to have their evil way
These days we
receive more and more requests from patients for a permanent record of
their surgery to show to Family, friends and colleagues. due to this
demand we can offer you this unique chance to capture your operation on
video. For an inclusive fee of £99+ VAT we will film your operation in
it’s entirety and provide you with a VHS cassette or one of those new
After having your MARP fitted you
may have difficulty walking for approximately 24 hours, this is quite normal and
is nothing to worry about.
You may also suffer intermittent rectal bleeding and leakage for approximately 4
days after your procedure. A noted side effect of this device is a loud
high pitched whistling noise whilst breaking wind. Please be aware of this fact before
In a very small percentage of
these devices have been known to explode, causing rectal lacerations. All
Operations procedures performed by non-Qualified, semiskilled Surgeons.
The Betty Hubbard Clinic Bio-Science Laboratories except
no responsibility for loss of life or disability due to any side effects caused by an
ill fitting or misaligned MARP.
Please consult your physician before making any healthcare
decisions or for guidance about a specific medical condition you
stupid pricks. The
Betty Hubbard Clinic expressly disclaims responsibility, and shall
have no liability, for any damages, loss, injury to your Dung
Trumpet and Gammon washer, or liability
whatsoever suffered as a result of your reliance on the
information contained in this site. The Betty Hubbard Clinic does
not endorse specifically any test, treatment, or procedure
mentioned on this site.
to The New Site of the Weird
No copyright infringement is
intended. All images, audio, and video clips featured on this site
are the sole
property of their respective owners