Here's some recent nutter reports we've received
Area spotted:
Shepton Mallet, Somerset, UK
Nutter's name:
Gecko Feet
Behaviour of nutter:
Seen hanging around 'Shepton Shops'. This nutter
has hideously weird feet, spread out like a gecko. His other nickname is 'Craghopper'
due to his ability to keep his balance whilst defying precariously dangerous
terrain. He is also known to be able to open bottles of beer and pour into a
glass with his feet. He is identifiable by his zombie walk and his grunting, a
sound like Joey Deacon. Beware of him on
a full moon!
Area
spotted:
Braintree, Essex
Nutter's name: hedge row hunk
Behaviour of nutter: Hiding in hedge rows
especially in parks, woods and back street walkways and
waiting for unsuspecting dog walkers (especially little
old ladies) and snatching the animals they so dearly
love and dogging them in the bushes. Seen mainly in the
early hours of the morning.
Area
spotted:
Bury
Nutter's name:
wacky
bastard
Behaviour of nutter:
He was in a
bush rubbing a tree whilst licking a cats ass and
sucking a dogs cock and taking pictures of kids walking
past whilst boniga monkey
Area spotted:
Taunton
Nutter's name:
Taunton Tranny
Behaviour of nutter:
Seen wandering the
streets of Taunton with greasy receding hair yanked into
a ponytail, wearing an ill fitting fleece with a floral
skirt and matching croc shoes. Walks with a stick in a
strange way that may indicate that his/her? bits
are still sore from the recent gender reassignment
operation.
Click
here for
video (Thanks AB)
Area
spotted:
Brighton Hollingdean
Nutter's name: Catherine
Behaviour of nutter:
she
goes through bins and collects rubbish
and take it home to her flat and she
also eats grass drops rotten food out
the windows
Area
spotted:
Oxford
Nutter's name: The
welsh wizard
Behaviour of nutter:
He
walks around sometimes on all fours
licking the floor and even seen him lick
people's shoes as they are sat down!!!!
he also carries around a blow up sheep
and a pot of Vaseline. Please do not
approach him
Area spotted:
Foxton Locks
Nutters
name:
Evan O'dorney
Behaviour
of nutter:
Following people up and down the locks,
talking to self (pretending to have
friends) and talking to them on the
phone when there is nobody there, trying
to get people to talk to him constant
shaking of head.
Thanks to Daniel for this submission
Area spotted:
lfracombe
Nutters
name:
edga brownhat
behaviour of nutter:
sings the national anthem to all
dustbins around the town while on his
knees
Thanks to Bot for this submission
Area spotted:
Cantley, Doncaster
Nutters name:
Keith D
behaviour of nutter:
Abducts southerners for his evil plans
and captures Scottish people from all
over the UK!
